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Football Jokes
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Lincoln City's Lee Frecklington, Ben Wright and Scott
Kerr are travelling by train to an away game in London.
Who should be waiting at same station but Macclesfield
Town's Keith Alexander, Franny Green and Martin Gritton
who are also travelling to London. At the station, the
Macclesfield players each buy tickets and watch as the
Lincoln stars buy only a single ticket.
'How are three people going to travel on only one
ticket?' asks a bewildered Alexander.
'Watch and you'll see,' snickered Frecklington.
They all board the train. The Macclesfield three take
their respective seats but all three Imps' players cram
into a restroom and close the door behind them. Shortly
after the train has departed, the conductor comes around
collecting tickets. He knocks on the restroom door and
says, 'Ticket, please.' The door opens just a crack and a
single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor
collects the ticket and moves on.
The Macclesfield trio see this and agree it is quite a
clever idea. So after the game, they decide to copy the
Lincoln players for the return trip and save some money.
When they get to the station, they buy a single ticket
for the return trip. To their astonishment, neither
Frecklington, Wright or Kerr buys a ticket at all.
'How are you going to travel without a ticket?' asks one
perplexed Green.
'Watch and you'll see,' laughed Kerr. When they board the
train the Macclesfield three cram into a restroom while
the three Imps cram into another one nearby. The train
departs. Shortly afterwards, Wright leaves his restroom
and walks over to the restroom where the Macclesfield
trio are hiding. He knocks on the door and says, 'ticket
please.......'
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Notts County manager Ian McParland was
wheeling his shopping trolley across the supermarket car
park when he noticed an old lady struggling with her bags
of shopping.
He stopped and asked, "Can you manage dear?" to
which the old lady replied, "no way, you got
yourself into this mess so don't ask me to sort it
out!"
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A man goes into a pub with an alligator under his arm.
"Do you serve Hull City fans here?" he asks.
"Certainly Sir; no problem at all," replies the
barman, nervously staring at the alligator.
"Okay," says the man, "a pint of lager for
me and a Hull City fan for the alligator."
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