Football Jokes - Page 3
David and Victoria
Beckham were trying to mix with their posh neighbours
when they were invited to a party. The conversation
turned to Mozart, "Absolutely
brilliant…lovely…oh, a fine fellow…a
genius of a man was Mozart." said one man to
Beckham.
David, wanting to get in on the conversation remarked,
"Ah, Mozart. You're so right. It was just this
morning that I saw him getting on the No.44 bus going to
Old Trafford."
There was a sudden hush and all eyes were turned towards
him. Victoria pulled him aside and angrily snapped,
"We're leaving right now."
In the car on the way home David turned to Victoria and
said, "You're really mad about something aren't
you?"
"How could you tell! I've never been so embarrassed
in my life! You saw Mozart take the No. 44 bus to Old
Trafford, huh? Showing me up like that, you idiot!
Everybody knows that the No. 44 bus doesn't go to Old
Trafford!"
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A Scunthorpe
United fan and a Lincoln City fan crashed their cars into
each other on a country road.
The Lincoln fan, seeing that the Scunthorpe fan was a
little shaken up, helped him from the car and offered him
a drink from his hip flask.
The Scunny fan accepted and handed the flask back to the
Lincoln fan, who closed it and put it away.
"Aren't you going to have a drink yourself?"
asked the Scunthorpe supporter.
"Sure.....after the police leave!" replied the
Lincoln fan.
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Two Lincoln
City fans were travelling in a car to watch Lincoln play
Hartlepool but they got lost along the way.
"I've no idea where we are?" said the first
fan.
"Don't worry" replied the second, "I have
an idea". With that he stuck his arm out of the car
window. "We're in Hull."
"How do you know that?" asked the first fan
amazed?
"I just had my watch nicked!" came the reply.
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